Dealer’s Choice – White Crime / Eugene / F**king Werewolf Asso Dealer’s Choice – White Crime / Eugene / F**king Werewolf Asso

pokerThis ain’t no party baby and it sure ain’t no fucking disco because we all know that gilded sweat and BJ nonsense (and, yes, there is such a thing) ended in broken bones YEARS ago no matter what the pompous pop peregrines say with their hazy teeth and bullshit projectors. That’s a lie. This can totally be a party. Fun is what you make of it and I just turned this severed artery into a double post Pollack for the community of spiders sleeping in the corner of a ceiling crack so, yeah man…YEAH! LET’S FUCKING DO THIS! DC IS ALL CRANKED AND UNSUPERVISED SO LET’S GET THAT FEAR FUCK IN THE FACE, NOW, FOREVER AND EVER FUCK YEAH!

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a2121054243_2White Crime
“Fingerless Gloves” from Bat Shit Records Vol. IV

The best kind of punk is the glue-stained low rent boombox Repo Man killing spree alien wet dream madness as espoused by so many who end up riddled with the tepid “garage” nomenclature but really just want to get wasted and sucked off on stage if that’s okay which it is because Lemmy’s done it and then Danny Brown (though the latter was MUCH less Lemmy and much more “someone please get this crazy bitch off me) and GG but he’s a terrible standard for anyone other than Gacy so yeah. These nitwits are from Houston and they fucking own the stank pogo. Also, how the FUCK didn’t I know there was a label called Bat Shit (from Oakland, no less)? The Tooz, rules dudes.

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a2206206057_2Eugene
“K 9 6 9” from NECROCRUNK

Eugene is Renard Queenston (I think). Renard Queenston runs LapFox Trax. According to WikiFur (which is a thing) “Renard Queenston (born 1988), is an agendered electronic musician and game designer. They live in Hamilton, Ontario, Canada.” I believe they are a fox and that this track is a noise sleaze deep bass unfurling of two canines orally celebrating each other’s genitals (subtlety is so passé). I do not understand where the third person pronoun comes in to play but that just means (along with, you know, everything) that papa’s found a new rabbit hole to occupy his dick brain. Is that punny? I hope not.

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a3803798758_2Fucking Werewolf Asso
“Yasuko Onuki” from Fucking Werewolf Asso

I believe this band is Swedish which I want to imagine says a lot but as I’ve never been, I really have no fucking idea. Ms. Beth introduced me to them on a dare, I think. A challenge. A “fuck you for not being first” and I appreciate the hell out of that because a good man can never get quite enough squeaky keyboard drum scream nodes in half punk nerd off melee odes to the foxy siren from noisenik wunderkinds, Melt Banana. I’m just gonna go ahead and tell you this band is total bleeding destruction live. Like, no survivors, fucking never. Amen.



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